Coauthored with Joseph Kim Paxton, this article looks at miscarriage through the lens of men by identifying five experiences, three struggles, and seven actions you can do to care for men through miscarriage whether you are partner or friend. Research suggests men begin to show signs of grief three to six months after the miscarriage. This is because they are living into their protector provider role during the immediate months after the event and repressing and delaying their own grief. This repression can lead to Complicated Grief (or Unresolved Grief) when men become stuck in the beginning stages of grief instead of journeying through the full spectrum. In addition, a man’s grief from miscarriage is disenfranchised both culturally and relationally. Support groups, networks, family, and friends are more likely to offer support to the woman and much less likely to offer direct support to the male.

One of my goals with this article is to view the concept of miscarriage through a different lens; one which is not my own. A second, equally important goal is to argue that miscarriage is not a women’s issue; miscarriage affects the whole family and community. Miscarriage is disruptive and fracturing not just to the woman, but to all whose lives have been changed by the taste of new life and legacy.

Read the full article here.